Goodbye 2016 Almost

At the dawn of this year, I wrote a blog welcoming 2016. Apparently 2016 did not appreciate this welcome because honestly it’s been kind of a bitch. But this is supposed to be a positive blog so I’m not going to dwell on that. The point is that as of yesterday, every expectation I had for this year has been met. With that in mind, and the fact that there’s only 2 months left of this overall nightmare, I have decided to bid 2016 adieu early and recap what happened in the past 10 months as I anticipated in January.

Art History II means the return of captioned art snapchat stories, which will likely also be found on this blog because evidently I’m not the only one who thinks they’re funny.

Yep. This happened and it was hilarious. The only time it made it on this blog, however, was when I went to the Art Institute of Chicago. For more examples snapchat me. Or email me or message me on Facebook or whatever, I’m literally always ready to show people these because they are, frankly, my best work.

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This is also relevant because, as of today, I declared my major as a Frankenmajor. What this means is that I am designing my own “Individually Designed Interdepartmental Major,” or IDIM. I haven’t given it a name quite yet, but it will be combining English literature, German/Scandinavian studies, anthropology, and, yes, art history. The goal is to tie in folklore as well and study humanity from the angle of what we’ve made and why we’ve made it.

I have accepted constant peeing as the price for staying hydrated and will now be drinking water more than once a month like a camel.

I was really good at this until like 2 months ago when I gave up but in the last week I’ve gotten slightly better again. But it was all for naught. I have another kidney stone, folks. I don’t care. I’m going to drink exactly as much tea, coffee, and water as I want. We’re all going to die anyway.

I’m either going to love or hate Shakespeare for good. Either way, be prepared to hear a lot about him.

Again, this was kind of way more relevant than I thought it was going to be. I did take another Shakespeare class at SCAD and wrote about it, but then I decided to transfer to University of Minnesota with the original intent of majoring in English. Since that SCAD class wasn’t “upper level,” I’m enrolled in yet another Shakespeare course. It covers way more material than previous classes and the professor is more interested in exploring Shakespeare’s language than just learning the plot, so I’m actually pretty okay with it. There is a distinct chance I will distill what I’ve learned into a third blog about Shakespeare and a fourth blog exploring feminism in literature/media. Stay tuned. I’m kind of sorry.

February 20th is my chance to remedy my greatest regret and take a picture with Jukebox the Ghost drummer Jesse Kristin. You will know beyond any shadow of a doubt when this happens.

YEP. It happened and it was amazing.

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This July will mark the third time I get to blow a German’s mind by taking them to Walmart.

Well as it turned out this particular German had already been to Walmart. So instead we took him to the Corn Palace. And he ate everything with a knife and fork.

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Literally everything.

My political influence on the town of Gretna will increase substantially when my best friend is elected to city council.

Easily the most exciting thing on this list. Wow. As of yesterday, my #1 best friend in the whole wide world was elected to represent Ward 1 of Gretna in City Council. In the midst of a widely disappointing election for many, this is a reason to celebrate.

Logan (or should I say Councilman Herring) worked so. freaking. hard. For an entire year. He registered as a candidate the day registration opened. He started attending city council meetings immediately after registering to run for city council. He spent every spare moment acquainting himself with the city, other public servants, and the needs of his constituents. I know this to be true because as his BFF I heard it all.

And as soon as there were things to be done, he did them. He went to a forum hosted by the women of Sarpy County where people asked if we were married. (We’re not. We’re 20.) He marched in the Gretna Days Parade with a group of devoted supporters, and I heard from every side throughout the entire route kids waving and shouting, “Mr. Logan!! Mr. Logan!!” because he’s basically the most popular employee at Kids Connection. Yeah, by the way, he was working and attending college the whole time he was running a campaign.

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Basically what I’m getting at is that Councilman Herring is a giant nerd. He knows so much about local government (and national and international government and economics and America) that it’s frankly unbelievable. And he knows all of this because he cares so much about improving Gretna. Everyone who voted for him made such a great decision for themselves and their city, and I can’t wait to see the great things Logan does over the coming years. He worked harder for this position than anyone has ever worked for anything, and he’s going to kill it as a city councilor.

And, in 2032, he will kill it as the President of the United States of America.

Bonus 2016 Events:

  • The Cubs won the World Series. Whaaaaaaa????!!
  • Some of my art was hung up in Wallin Hall.
  • I stayed in a cabin where the refrigerator and the toilet were in the same room.
  • I house sat for FOUR DOGS AT THE SAME TIME. It was LIT.
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I don’t have any pictures of all of them, but this is Hunter. He’s my favorite.
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